


Too Good to Compare

by doublecheckyoself



Series: Full Bellies [3]
Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Belly Kink, Blow Jobs, Burping, Cake, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Established Relationship, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rough Sex, Stuffing, don't eat the dove but you CAN eat the cake, like a lot of burping, mission, not during the smutty part tho, the other old guard peeps are there for a bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:34:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28084755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doublecheckyoself/pseuds/doublecheckyoself
Summary: Joe gets off on feeding Nicky, Nicky gets off on being fed by Joe.  Sometimes you have to take a break in the middle for a mission, but when you're Joe and Nicky it only spurs you on.Aka: a Kaysanova stuffing smut fic.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: Full Bellies [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1512527
Kudos: 50





	Too Good to Compare

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all! I haven't been back at this account in a hot second, apologies about that. I got sucked into other things. But I'm back at it again with another full belly! Hope you enjoy! As always, please make sure to read the tags. If it's not your thing, that's okay--no one will get mad if you click on out.

“No, no more. Joe. I am so _stuffed_ , no.”

Joe leans back in Nicky’s lap, drawing his free hand up his husband’s side as Nicky does these little huffing pants, as if he can’t get a full breath into his lungs. Joe is nude and straddling Nicky’s thighs, knees on either side of Nicky’s hips as Nicky, also nude, sits propped up against a pile of pillows. It’s an intentional arrangement—in addition to putting them as close to each other as they physically can be for this sort of thing, it also gives Joe a _fantastic_ view. 

“Are you sure you’re done?” he asks, stroking his fingers up Nicky’s stuffed tummy, beautifully framed as it is by Joe’s thighs. It already has three full plates of pasta in it, plus some wine and a strawberry smoothie. They’re now working on a slice of cake, a bite of which Joe holds up enticingly as Nicky suppresses a burp. “You don’t want a little more? For me?”

“I _want_ …” Nicky says, and drops his forehead onto Joe’s pec, winding his arms around Joe’s waist, “to suck you off.”

A thrill goes through Joe, cock twitching with interest as Nicky slowly laves his tongue over Joe’s nipple. Joe shudders under the attention, humming appreciatively. After a moment, however, he pushes down the want, the desire, guiding Nicky back and away. He has a mission today, and getting his dick wet, while definitely still on the table, is a secondary objective.

“All in due time,” he says, and strokes his knuckles up Nicky’s cheek. Nicky tilts his head into the touch. “Let me take care of you first. Let me feed you until you really can’t eat any more. You’re always taking care of us, let me do this for you.”

Nicky breathes in as deeply as he can, letting out his breath in a gusting sigh. He’s smiling, though, a twitch of his lips just for Joe. “Oh, fine,” he says, cheeky, as if he didn’t agree to this before they even started. Then he opens his mouth, allowing Joe to place the fork carefully on his tongue. His lips close around the tines and Joe draws the utensil out, imagining for just a moment that those lips are wrapped around something else. 

Nicky hums, chewing slowly before he swallows. As soon as the bite is down he burps again, clearly trying to keep them quiet and unobtrusive.

“Here,” Joe says, and leans over to grab the glass of milk off the bedside table. He grins, watching Nicky as Nicky watches the muscles of his chest and shoulders move. He resettles, guiding the drink to Nicky’s lips and letting him set his own pace. Nicky drinks down a third of it before leaning back, one hand pressed against the top of his distended stomach. He tucks his chin, burping yet again.

“Doing okay?” Joe asks,

“I can’t keep down the burps,” Nicky says, and, as if to demonstrate, lets out another.

God _damn_ is that hot. Joe resists the urge to grind his hips down onto Nicky’s lap. “Then don’t try,” he says instead, and bends down to press a kiss to Nicky’s nose, breathing carefully to keep himself in check. “Let them up.”

Nicky’s eyes go wide. “Does that do something for you?” he asks, all faux-innocence. 

Joe can’t help it—he groans aloud, his hips jerking. The motion drags his cock over Nicky’s belly, and he sucks in a breath. “It does,” he admits, staring down at Nicky with half-lidded eyes. “It really, really does. The thought of you so full that you can’t help it, watching you lose yourself to baser instincts and the desire to eat, filling yourself to the point that they come out whether you want them to or not—yeah. That does something for me.”

Nicky hums, his eyes sharp, calculating. They flick down to Joe’s cock then up again. Then, slow and intentional, he tilts his head back and relaxes, letting a long, slow burp crawl up his throat. 

It should be disgusting. Joe is aware of this in a distant way. It should be the worst turn-off ever. But nothing Nicky does ever truly turns him off—not anymore. He’s conditioned to everything Nicky, his cock responding to the burp as if Nicky had let out a sex moan instead. His breath stutters, and his thighs squeeze, and it’s all he can do not to push Nicky down and put his cock in his filthy mouth.

And Nicky, damn him, just grins a sly grin and does it again.

Joe shivers, desire pooling in his groin. “You never did fight fair,” he says, and he can see the desire in his eyes reflected back in Nicky’s gaze. 

Nicky shrugs, running his tongue over his lower lip. “Are we going to finish the cake or no?” he asks.

Joe swallows, focusing himself. He reaches for the plate on the sheets beside them, scooping up another bite of rich chocolate. Then, his heart beating quick and excited in his chest, he lays it on Nicky’s tongue, watching as it disappears behind pink lips. They alternate for a bit—a bite of cake and a sip of milk—until there are only two forkfuls left on the plate.

Nicky moans, low, and lets out a burp. “When do I get my treat?” he asks, licking a little bit of icing from the corner of his mouth with a focus that does things to Joe’s insides.

“Soon,” Joe says, and raises the second to last bite. “You’re doing so good for me, sweetheart.”

“I should hope so,” Nicky says, and moans around the cake. His hand is again on his stomach, massaging gently—Joe moves it aside to replace it with his own hand, feeling Nicky’s stretched stomach working under his palm. 

“One more,” Joe says, and scoops up the last of the chocolate confection. Nicky is panting again, his stomach so full it’s pressing up into his lungs, but he valiantly takes the last bite, swallowing it down and then opening his mouth again for the last of the milk. Joe raises the glass to Nicky’s lips, watching Nicky’s adam’s apple bob as he drinks it all down.

He’s gasping by the time he’s done, pushing himself forward until his forehead rests against Joe’s shoulder.

“How are you doing, _habibi_?” Joe asks, pressing his palm flat against Nicky’s belly button and working his hand in little circles. His other hand goes to the back of Nicky’s neck, his fingers running through the hair at his nape in little soothing strokes. 

Nicky groans and burps in response, working up a few of them one after another before he tries to speak. “So stuffed…” he says. Then he rolls his head to the side, peering up at Joe with one hooded eye to say, “Treat now.”

And how can Joe possibly deny a man who has done so well for him tonight?

Joe hums, pushing himself out of Nicky’s lap. He fixes up the pillows, adjusts Nicky’s position until he’s half-upright, and then plants his knees on either side of Nicky’s ribcage, all but sitting on his chest, putting Nicky’s mouth at the perfect height. “You tell me if you start feeling sick,” he warns, pumping his cock a few quick times to get it fully hard. 

Nicky nods eagerly, pulling Joe’s hand away. He pauses there for a moment, just soaking in Joe’s length in a way that has Joe struggling not to squirm with arousal. The way Nicky looks at him, even after all this time… it’s heady. He looks at Joe like Joe is the center of the universe, like he’s the sun and Nicky the earth, orbiting around him and basking in his light. He looks at Joe like he doesn’t want for anything when Joe is in front of him, because Joe gives him all he could ever ask for and more. And Joe… it’s the same for him. He could write a thousand lines of poetry about Nicky, a million, a billion, more, all in an attempt to capture the love that overflows in his heart at the sight of Nicky between his legs.

Then Nicky grips his cock and licks the head in one long, slow stroke and every single word except ‘ _oh_ ’ and ‘ _fuck_ ’ flies right out of Joe’s mind. “Oh, _fuck_ ,” he says aloud, pawing for the headboard.

“Mmm,” Nicky agrees, already in the process of wrapping his lips around Joe’s cock above his hand. He sucks, once, and this time Joe’s fingers find his hair, holding on for dear life. He holds on as Nicky bobs his head, one hand on Joe’s hips to guide him forward, a little farther each time until Joe bottoms out, Nicky’s nose nestled on his pubic bone. Then Nicky draws back again, a little faster, drawing a noise from deep in Joe’s chest as he goes. He then sets a pace that Joe easily follows, a series of quick, easy thrusts into the warmth of Nicky’s mouth that bring him closer and closer to the edge with every passing second.

Until Nicky pauses, anyway, hand coming up to grip Joe’s shaft as he pulls back, his other hand rising to press against his lips. His throat works.

“Feeling okay?” Joe asks, breathing coming a little heavy.

Nicky nods. Then he opens his mouth and lets out a _monster_ of a burp, all but pushing it out. Another follows right on its tail, rumbling up from the pit of his stomach. He moans in relief, letting his head fall back against the pillows. “Sorry,” he pants. “Held it too long. It really wanted to come out.”

“ _Christ_ ,” Joe says, for lack of anything coherent to say. There’s pre-cum beading at the tip of his cock just from that, holy _shit_.

Nicky smirks, licking it off. Then he dives back in, working Joe until Joe is a gasping mess. It doesn’t take long, in all honesty—Joe was already halfway there just from watching Nicky belch like that. Joe moans, his back curving as he presses an elbow to the headboard, his other hand still in Nicky’s hair.

“Gonna—gonna come—” he says. Nicky hums in acknowledgment, and the vibration of his voice ties Joe’s hands and throws him right over the edge. He hunches over, his entire body pulled taut, as Nicky swallows and swallows and swallows and—

He pulls off of Joe’s dick with a filthy little _pop_ , licking his lips with a pleased expression on his face. Joe holds onto the headboard with noodly-fingers, pressing his sweaty face against his forearm and trying to catch his breath and return feeling to his limbs. With Nicky’s help he manages to slide sideways off of Nicky’s chest, collapsing onto the pillows beside him.

Nicky’s distended stomach is much more noticeable from this angle than it was from above. He doesn’t seem fazed by it, though—all he does is sigh, content, letting out a small burp as he drags a hand up the curve of it, from the bottom to the top.

Joe breathes out, slow and steady, slipping his fingers through Nicky’s and raising his hand to press a kiss to his knuckles. “You did so good for me,” he says. “How about I return the favor, hm?”

Nicky nods, his head lolling to the side to meet Joe’s eyes. “Mmm yes, let’s do that,” he says. Joe nods, and is just getting up on his hands and knees to crawl down between Nicky’s legs when there’s an abrupt knock at the door.

“What?” Joe says, sharper than he means to.

“Get your shit together, we’ve got a time-sensitive mission,” Andy says from the other side.

“Aw shit, boss. Now? Do we have to?” Joe asks, settling back on his haunches.

“Yes, _now_. You can get your rocks off later, let’s _go_!”

Nicky snorts. “He’s already gotten his rocks off, boss,” he says, and Joe throws a pillow over his face even as he bursts out laughing. Nicky pulls it down, grinning, before he pushes himself up with a groan.

The two of them get dressed back to back, covert black clothes and matching boots. Joe then turns around and secures Nicky’s tactical vest, suiting him up and carefully adjusting all of the straps so that they’re secure but not too tight over his full stomach. He presses a kiss to Nicky’s lips, wriggling his eyebrows until Nicky snorts again. He swears he can taste himself on those lips still—it’s heady, and he pauses just a moment to moan.

“You’re a _tease_ ,” Nicky moans back, his brows drawing together. He deepens the kiss for a moment before pulling away again. “Later,” he says, and claps Joe on the shoulder.

“Mmm. Or we could kiss a little more now,” Joe says, following him dreamily as he sets out the door. He’s still floating in that post-orgasm bliss, feeling sappy as all hell.

Nicky laughs, shaking his head. “No. Mission now, kiss later.”

“Fiiine,” Joe says. This doesn’t stop him from pressing his lips to Nicky’s cheek, however.

The mission briefing is easy and simple. They’re after a hard drive that Copley says will help put away a local mob boss—the reason it’s time sensitive is that the boss in question is gearing up for something big, and they need to get the drive and crack the encryption on it before he does. Joe nods along, sneaking glances at Nicky. With all his gear on it’s hard to tell that Nicky is so stuffed—if it weren’t for him muffling burps into his fist Joe would have no idea that he’s still feeling it.

He bumps shoulders with Nicky on the way to the car, getting an amused huff in return. He holds out a communicator for Nicky to take. Nicky is going to be up on the roof of the next building over watching the entrance just in case anyone who isn’t expected shows up. It’s annoying, when they’re separated like that, but Nicky is unchallenged when it comes to long-range sniping—he and Joe both know splitting up is a necessary evil.

They split at the base of the building opposite their targeted one, Nicky going up to get in position. It’s then that Joe hears it—the click of a comm turning off. A moment later it comes back on. He glances quickly around at the others, but no one seems to have made a move for their comms. He frowns.

“ _In position_ ,” Nicky says over the line. Andy grunts, gesturing the rest of them forward. Andy, then Nile and Booker, with Joe at the rear covering their backs.

They’re inside, having taken care of the two guards at the front of the building, before it happens again. A comm turning off, a second or two, and then back on again. Andy frowns, turning her ‘mission glare’ over at the rest of them. They don’t have time to discuss it—not until they’re further in. There are three more night guards wandering around that they need to either evade or take out. They’ll need to keep their eyes peeled, waiting for—

—ah. They’re dead already. Joe snorts at the three of them, each with a bullet in their heads from Andy’s silenced gun. He hopes the poker game they were playing was worth it.

“That should be all of them,” Andy says, just as the comm clicks off once again. “And whoever is doing that you’d better stop.”

The comm clicks back on, almost sheepishly. Joe snorts. Then they head down toward the basement for the drive.

There’s nothing of note for a while as they work their way down the stairs, forcing their way through the locked doors. Nicky is silent in his position, and Joe imagines that he can see him—lying on his front on the rooftop, eye to the scope of his rifle, watching the street down below. He gets so still when he concentrates, it’s beautiful.

And then, of course, he burps. Long and low, another of those monsters, like he was trying to hold it in and couldn’t.

Nile twitches, a frown on her face. “Did you have to do that right in our ears?” Andy asks, glancing through the window in the next door before she shoulders her way through.

“ _Sorry_ ,” Nicky says. “ _That_ _’s why I was turning it off._ ” 

“Well, the on and off wasn’t much better,” Andy says. “Just keep it on, okay?”

Nicky huffs an agreement. “ _Got it, boss_.” He then shuts his mouth, focusing on his task and allowing them to focus on theirs. The only problem is that Joe suddenly _can_ _’t_ focus—not when he can hear him swallowing if he listens hard enough, Nicky trying to keep another one down. Swallowing and swallowing until he can’t hold it anymore and then—

 _Uuuurp_.

“ _Excuse_ ,” Nicky says.

Andy rolls her eyes. “Do that one more time, I dare you,” she says.

“ _I can_ _’t help it, boss_.” Nicky swallows and burps again, muffled like he’s pressing it into his shoulder. “ _Excuse_.”

“Are you okay?” Nile asks, glancing over at Joe as Andy pushes into the main computer room, gun at the ready. _Act normal_ , Joe tells himself. He gives her a non-committal shrug. 

This, apparently, tips Andy off to what they were doing before the mission, because she takes one look at him and starts to laugh. “I know what you two did,” she says. 

“Wait, what did they—” Booker starts. Joe sees the moment he gets it, too, because he stuffs his gun back into its holster with a heavy sigh, sinking down to start working on prying out the drive they need. “Oh,” he says, rolling his eyes.

“What do you mean, ‘oh’? Is he actually sick?” Nile asks.

“It’s a sex thing, Nile,” Andy says, at the same time as Nicky says, “ _It was just something I ate_.”

The comms go dead silent. Joe takes the opportunity to close his eyes and focus really _really_ hard on not thinking about the last thing that Nicky ate. Because it was his cum. The last thing Nicky swallowed was his cum and if he thinks about that, about the fact that Nicky might still be able to _taste it_ , he’s going to pop a boner in the middle of a mission. He’s better than that, or at least he hopes he is—he’s had nine hundred years to work on his self-restraint, after all.

It helps—slightly—that after a long, painful second Nile huffs and says, “Y’all nasty.”

“Probably more so than you think,” Booker says, which, hey now. Joe is aware that there are very few things that he and Nicky haven’t tried during the long, _long_ stretch of their relationship thus far, but this in particular is relatively tame. Feeding Nicky, taking care of him… it’s hot specifically because it _isn_ _’t_ sex. It’s intimate in a whole different way, a way that serves to _elevate_ the sex, and okay, yeah, Joe needs to turn off his brain and stop thinking right now.

They manage to get through the rest of the mission with no mishaps, though there is still a decent amount of burping coming from Nicky’s direction. Joe is nearly out of his mind by the time they reconvene at the car, and the fact that Nile is watching them like a hawk is the only reason he doesn’t kiss Nicky right then and there. He struggles to keep himself under control, breathing slowly as Nicky muffles more belches into his hand on the way home.

“I don’t care what you people do in the privacy of your own room, but please— _please_ —keep the noise down,” Nile says when they finally get home after dropping off the drive. She shudders, frowning at them. “I do not need to hear any of… _that_.”

“No promises,” Nicky says, as Joe ushers him from the room. Joe nearly slaps a hand over his mouth, but the damage is already done—Nile looks faintly sick, like she’s rethinking her decision to come back and live with them all.

It’s enough to dampen Joe’s arousal, just enough for him to think clearly. He swallows, closing their door with a soft click. Nicky isn’t looking at him, instead choosing to begin stripping off his mission gear.

“Hey,” Joe says softly, touching his arm to get his attention. “Maybe we should cool it for the night. Let you sleep off some of that food.”

Nicky emerges from his shirt, hair ruffled and his full stomach poking out. “Are you _kidding me_?” he asks, sounding affronted.

Joe blinks. “What, you don’t think we’ve scarred Nile enough for one night? And the others, too, they’re never going to let us live this one do—”

Nicky’s eyes lock onto Joe’s. “Screw. Them,” he says, and his voice is so low and _hungry_ that Joe is suddenly on the other side of the universe from anything that could be considered holy. “Do you know what you _did to me_?” Nicky asks, pushing into Joe’s space. “How you’ve _ruined me_?”

Joe shakes his head, his eyes wide. Nicky keeps moving, pressing him up against the door, his stomach warm and tight on the far side of the tactical vest. He leans in to Joe’s ear, his voice low and says…

“…All I could taste that entire mission, on my tongue every time I burped, was _you_.”

And oh, sweet motherfucking _jesus_. Joe has to hold onto Nicky’s elbows to keep himself upright as all his blood floods downward. Nicky is hardly any better, diving forward and locking his lips with Joe’s like he’s a starving man and Joe is a feast fit for kings. He pushes into Joe, yanking at his vest with wild abandon. He pulls it off along with Joe’s shirt, immediately ducking down to nip at one of Joe’s exposed nipples, fingers fumbling for Joe’s belt.

“You want me to suck you off now?” Joe asks, working to help him derobe the both of them, kicking boots off and letting them land where they may.

Nicky shudders, shaking his head. “I need you—inside me—right _fucking_ now.”

Now _that_ Joe can _do_. He groans, pushing back into Nicky and claiming his mouth. It takes but a moment to spin them until Nicky is up against the door, moaning as Joe runs his hands down Nicky’s back until he has him by the hips, drawing him in close until they’re belly to belly. He can feel Nicky’s stomach gurgling and it just serves to drive him a little bit mad—until, that is, Nicky twists in his grip, planting his hands on the door frame and presenting his ass.

Joe grins, hooking one of his feet around the handle of the bag sitting next to the bed. He draws it close and then ducks down, pulling out a little bottle of lube. He coats his fingers—not much, just enough to get them started. He presses two in at once, knowing already that Nicky is asking for it rough, his other hand flat against Nicky’s full stomach to hold him in place.

Nicky whines, rolling his hips back onto the fingers. “Do it fast,” he says, a tinge of desperation in his voice. “Want you _inside me_.”

“I know, sweetheart, I know,” Joe says, and presses his lips against the back of Nicky’s neck. Then, holding Nicky tight, he scissors his fingers, stretching Nicky wide.

The noise Nicky muffles into his arm is the kind of noise that Joe swears was designed by some higher power to make him _lose his fucking mind_. Something just shy of a wail, deep and guttural, it does things to him that he didn’t think were possible. He twists his wrist, moving his fingers again, and Nicky shudders and makes another noise, slightly higher than the first. He’s panting now, sweat building along the curve of his back—he burps, and Joe knows he’s still tasting cum on his tongue by the way one hand releases the doorframe, clutching Joe’s hand on his stomach as if he can force more out.

“Come on,” he says, and Joe knows that he could get him begging in seconds flat if he cared to try. “Do it, come on—”

Joe twists his wrist again, grinning—then he does just as Nicky asks, lining up and slamming in, all in one smooth motion.

Nicky keens, utterly failing to muffle it this time. “Oh _fuck_ ,” he says, grinding his hips back, clearly enjoying the stretch. He’s so tight and warm around Joe—god. He’s beautiful.

“Here we go, _habibi_ ,” Joe says, wrapping both arms around Nicky’s stomach. He eases back and _slams_ back in. Then again, and again, setting a quick and brutal pace, Nicky’s noises spurring him on. It’s good—it’s right. He’s never felt more in tune with anyone than he does with Nicky, and right now it’s as if they’re one organism, Joe thrusting and Nicky pushing back to meet him, bodies slamming together. As the pleasure rises in his own body he slides one hand down between Nicky’s legs, working him as well until—

“ _Yusuf_!”

And just like that, Joe comes for the second time, in tandem with the love of his life. He holds Nicky around the waist, his other hand planting itself on the door as Nicky’s arms give out, both of them rocking forward, off-kilter. It’s like a wave of fire, a tsunami of heat—he feels like he’s being taken apart and put back together again. It’s a good thing he can’t die, because in that moment he swears he blacks out and sees Allah himself.

He comes back to himself on his knees, legs shaking, lungs gasping, Nicky in a similar state in front of him. He’s still inside Nicky, barely—he grunts as he wriggles back far enough to pull out, immediately pressing back up against Nicky’s spine once he does and hugging him to his chest. Nicky gasps, leaning forward to press his forehead against the door.

For a moment everything is quiet except their heavy breathing. Then Nicky shifts, his stomach muscles clenching under Joe’s arms until—

 _Uuuuuuuuurp_.

Joe can’t help it—he starts to laugh, a breathless, blissed-out sound. Nicky laughs with him, working up burps as he goes, until he’s steady enough to squirm around to face Joe. 

“I love you,” he says, eyes bright. “And I think… in a minute… we should go again.”

Joe grins, leaning forward to press a kiss to his lips, long and slow and tender. “Sounds good to me,” he says. For now, though, he’s content to bask in the warmth of Nicky’s love, listening to him as he burps, full and sated and completely, entirely Joe’s. It’s all Joe could ever ask for and more. And if he can’t look Nile in the face come morning, well… that’s Morning Joe’s problem.

**Author's Note:**

> Cheers!


End file.
